Will keeps making fun of me saying I sound like E.T. My finger and arm do really and truly hurt though. I show my emotions a lot too, so shoot me. We named my finger wrap curtis, silly I know but we had to make it funny. It looks like a little sausage I think.

So heres the story. How it would look in a newspaper.

(with some small exaggerations)

It was a busy wednesday night behind the bar at Berry Hill Revere. I was slinging drinks like Tom Cruise and people were lovin me. I began to feel a little faint and queasy from all of the business and my stage fright, the paparazzi were there, who wouldn't be nervous? So I sat down for a moment. Then the stylish couple at table one came up for another round of top shelf margaritas. I pick up a glass in each hand and set them on the edge of the bar, then CRACK! SMASH! JAB! SLICE!AHHHH! SPURT! The glass in my left broke at the stem and attacked my pinky finger. Some say the glass came to life, and that it was a scheme to get publicity for the famous people in the bar. Blood was pouring everywhere, the kitchen guys ran to my rescue as I burst into tears. They tried to stop the bleeding but it wasn't happening and I was starting to feel faint. I called for backup and tried to tame the roaring crowd. The stylish man said he knew the owner and tipped me 100 bucks for troopin through. Will showed up in helicopter and took me home. We thought I was okay... then we saw the blue and guts sticking out of my finger. Off to the emergency room... I fabulously filled out loads of paperwork and got my workers comp information. The news crew showed up and people were cheering me on! Elite 24hr emergency room said that my x-rays were so brilliant that they had to put them on a disk to show world. I watched as they sewed my finger back together, I was brave. They let me keep the tools so I can use them to sew at home. Hopefully not to sew skin back together. Will called the president and let him know that I was okay, and then we headed out into the night.


  1. have i ever told you how brilliant i think you are? well, you are. i hope you and curtis are feeling a bit better today! xox

  2. That was an awesome rendition! Hope you're okay! :)


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